So, in case you didn’t already hear about it, the TSA has released some more or less official plans on what they’re going to do following the antics of some Nigerian guy who attempted to explode himself and a plan using some sort of weird diaper with uncombined explosive compounds or some other idiotic idea.

Basically, the TSA’s plan boils down to this – people coming into America from international flights can now expect random “surprises,” for example, not being able to move from your chair for the last hour of the flight – for any reason. Another great one they’re cooking up is not letting anyone use any electronic devices, or even have them in carry-on luggage. Imagine, say, a 14 hour flight to Jordan, without so much as an electronic song playing machine to keep you company. It’s enough to make me want to brush up on my saxophone skills and bring one of those aboard – if only! Pity that part of the plan is also to restrict international travelers to one carry-on bag only…previously, I’ve always brought my backpack as a “personal item” and then a second small piece of luggage as the official “carry-on.” I’m not sure how that’s affected but I’m sure I’ll find out soon.

Seriously, how does not letting us use electronics on inbound flights keep us safer from diaper bombs? In my opinion, here’s what we should have had right after the 9/11 attacks: armed, trained National Guard-types in every plane, armed with rubber-bullet guns or some other sort of weaponry that wouldn’t depressurize a plane. Watch people standing up, moving around, and basically just keep watch. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

It’s at times like this when only knows how to sum up a situation. And now that laptop-less paranoid world parodied below may very well have come.